Lately I have been considering myself, and what I actually do during the day. For a while I was trying to get myself writing, to finish another book, maybe actually get published. I am still, supposedly, doing this, but about a week into this plan my exhaustion and burn-out from everything else kind of hit me across the face and now I haven't written in about a week or so.
The fact is, I love having this blog, but for a while I was finding it hard to get myself to write. I know that money shouldn't mean everything, but it does mean something and to me it means attempting to support my new family, at least a little bit, and getting paid for something that I actually want to do (which can also seem selfish to me sometimes, but that's a whole other topic). And I'm not getting paid to run this blog, or write reviews.
The funny thing about all this is that it seems to only apply to me, in my own head. If someone else came up to me with these problems, I would probably be insisting that they find what they want to do, what makes sense for them. I would be telling them to follow their dream and to make it work, darn it.
It sometimes just occurs to me that I thought I would be further along with my 'career' by now.
I am reassuring myself as much as possible. I love being a homemaker, and I am now married to my best friend in the entire world. We have a sweet little kitty and enough money to afford food and a lovely home to rent.
Sometimes you just have to remind yourself that your self-worth isn't completely based on what you do 'for a living'. Sometimes, what I do for a living is just live. Just be. And that is pretty fantastic.