Thursday, February 20, 2014

When one idle comment ruins your day.

even the hanging baskets in Disneyland are Micky-shaped...

You know the feeling.

You have been set on something. Or you have had to make a tough decision, but you feel comfortable with the outcome.

And then someone - usually someone you love and who loves you - says something so idle that it's almost like they haven't said anything at all, but it completely shakes you. Makes you reconsider things. Makes you wonder if you're actually that good at making decisions at all.

You feel hurt, lost, and sometimes even angry or upset with your loved one (or not-so-loved one). Emotions inside you have become turbulent.

You start thinking 'maybe I should change something? maybe I should go the other way?', at the same time as feeling misunderstood and frustrated.

Here are two simple things to keep in mind when this happens:

1. try to see the motivation behind the idle comment from your loved one. perhaps they just don't want you to get hurt, or they want you to have more fun. they probably don't know that their comment has caused you to feel such intense emotions or such pain. if the person isn't a loved one, I suggest remembering point 2 more readily...

2. this is YOUR journey. it isn't your parent's journey, your partner's, or your best friend's. It's YOURS. that means YOU get to make the choices. YOU are the one who will make the mistakes and learn from them. And no amount of idle comments from people is going to prevent you from making mistakes or moving forward or learning. you are the person calling the shots here, so see that idle comment like a paper plane, whooshing by. it's someone else's ideas (misguided or not) about how you should live your life - and they are NOT YOU.

All is well.

Lots of love to those who read.

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